


Shuichi Needs His Sleep.

by 11037BagsOfMilk



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: A LOT of insults thrown at Kokichi, Attempt at Humor, Explicit Language, Shuichi curses like a sailor, Shuichi is hella sassy, spoilers for chapter 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:41:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25588468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/11037BagsOfMilk/pseuds/11037BagsOfMilk
Summary: A murder occurs late at night and Shuichi is less than pleased.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 51





	Shuichi Needs His Sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Kinda bored so have this. I guess this is kinda considered as some sort of test chapter for an upcoming multichapter fic I've been working on. If you want to know more about it, I have the summary for it on my bio so... yeah... lmao I'll prob post that soon

_Ding dong bing bong…_

Shuichi groaned, scratching his head. He had literally _just_ fallen asleep and now someone dies again?! "A body has been discovered! Please head to the Ultimate Artist's lab. And stat! You're all ruining my beauty sleep, dammit!" Oh? Monokuma's mad? Well Shuichi was absolutely _seething._

He angrily got up, slammed the door and stormed to the designated crime scene, startling all those who had just left their rooms.

…

Everyone was a bit irritated for being woken up so early, but none of that compared to the enraged detective. If looks could kill, everyone would have been dead then and there. Shuichi moved swiftly and silently around the crime scene and anyone who dared to interrupt him was given a death glare.

Kaito swore to Maki that he had never seen the usually composed detective so pissed before and when she confronted Shuichi about it, was left completely and utterly speechless. The moment everyone saw the tiniest hint of fear on the assassin's eyes was the exact same moment they all _knew_ they should avoid Shuichi at all costs.

…

The trial was heading the same way again. Kokichi was now claiming that he had killed Angie, but Shuichi already saw through the... "decent" attempt at deception, "Kokichi, shut the fuck up. You're obviously lying so shut your damn trap and let me figure this shit out myself!" His voice boomed around the room and Kokichi scoffed, "Wow… quite the colorful language you got there, Shuichi!" His demeanor then contorted to something more sullen, "And I was just trying to help, too… WAAAAAAAAAAH! YOU'RE SO MEAN!!!"

Miu was grinning like an idiot at seeing the self proclaimed dictator get a taste of his own medicine while Gonta, Himiko, Kiibo, Tsumugi, and Kaito, displayed a look of pure shock and horror. Maki remained a neutral expression.

Shuichi sighed, clearly growing more and more irate by the second, "Cut the bullshit, you retired cum sock. You're not helping anyone and you definitely aren't the culprit. That honour goes to Kiyo, dipshit." An audible gasp could be heard throughout the room and the suspect was given the spotlight.

Korekiyo was now violently shaking and giving flimsy excuse after flimsy excuse until he pulled down his mask, where his personality changed completely.

By the end of the trial (which finished _way_ faster than usual), it was clear who the culprit was. But what shocked everyone more was Shuichi's irritated antics.

…

Morning had arrived and everyone visibly flinched when Shuichi walked into the dining hall. "Good morning." He greeted casually, appearing _much_ calmer than last night. The group greeted back, clearly uncomfortable. Shuichi narrowed his eyes, sitting down, "Kaito? Did something happen?" He whispered to the astronaut who was nervously sweating, "Uhhhhhh… you don't remember last night?" He asked.

Shuichi looked grim, "Kiyo, Angie, and Tenko died. I remember now." He muttered. Kaito was bewildered, "Do you really not remember last night??" He questioned and Shuichi now looked perplexed, "Remember what?"

"Nothing." Shuichi almost jumped from his seat at Maki's sudden cold interruption. He decided not to press further on the subject as Kaito clearly didn't seem comfortable on the topic.

Later that day, Kokichi managed to corner Shuichi and tell him everything, but the damage had been done. Everyone knew never to commit a murder late at night or early in the morning.

It was a guaranteed instant failure or a death wish if they did.

**Author's Note:**

> To clarify: this is supposed to be satire. Believe it or not, I ship oumasai and the insults thrown at Kokichi were meant to be a joke on my part and hopefully on yours too. Anyways have a nice day y'all! Thanks for reading my poor attempt at humor ♡(ŐωŐ人)


End file.
